Two Steps Away From Death's Door . . .

Tass? ... YOU need to be medicated.

Well, I can report that I haven't been on the IV drug thingy since about 10:30am this morning. They removed the IV lines and other stuff I was connected to. The only thing left is the IV line in my left hand in case they need it, BUT ...

That will be coming out soon because I'm actually going home tonight. The doctor has already called in my pain medication prescriptions, so I'll pick all that up on my way home later. They're in pill form of course, so not as fast acting. However, I DID learn, that the drip from the IV doesn't last that long, and the pills do, so that's a good thing, because I am now feeling the pain more.

They did 3 small incisions with the 4th one a little larger on the left because it required a few dissolvable stitches on the inside, and THAT's the one that hurts like a mother, but the surgical glue is holding famously.

My surgeon popped in just a little bit ago to see how I was doing. She's short with shoulder-length brown hair and cute as a button, but she sure is a master at what she does, and I am SO grateful. She came into my room in her scrubs to talk to Mom after the surgery while I was still in recovery to give her the good news.



Like I said earlier, I feel very blessed that things turned out the way they did, and while the pain is there, it's nothing like what I went through last year. I'm going to take me an Ambien tonight and FINALLY sleep my ass off, because you do NOT sleep in the hospital. There are FAR too many interruptions the clock around.

Next time I post I'll be at home, and I shouldn't be posting too many more updates before I close the thread, but we're waiting on the final report from pathology before we just do the regular follow-ups.

Hope everyone is doing well.

 

All I can say is ... it's nice to be home ... but I'm having major pain on the left side still, and the Vicodin that the doc prescribed doesn't seem to be doing much good ... maybe that's because I had a Demoral (or something like that) drip with a button attached to it. Whatever the case, I'm not having a good time right now.

In spite of the pain, I was at least able to get two 3-hr sessions of sleep without disturbance, so at least I'm getting somewere with THAT, and ... I didn't need to take an Ambien, because I fell asleep in my big chair while Mom and I were watching TV. I really don't like taking meds if I don't have to, because I don't baby myself, BUT ... this pain on the left side is too much, and I'll definitely deal with it.

My dear EwoK ... your little scenario was cute and pretty close to what happened, but ... it wasn't all about the vitals, and included ALL kinds of things they could think of to do, but I think it's part of their training to bill for everything they can. I had EKG's, almost daily blood draws to check my hemoglobin when I wasn't actually getting blood ... (13 units later and the operation, I'm holding steady at 9.9 - nice number, eh? ) ... my oxygenation was checked, my heart, my lungs, Electrocardiogram, Xrays, sonograms, and any number of other things to keep my ass awake for their prodding pleasure! I tell you, hospital staff are trained to be saddistic, especially in sleep interruptus.

Lots of love back to you too EwoK ... I can only imagine how things would have been if YOU were my medical attendant.

Although, I forgot to tell you about ONE visitor that was actually WAY cool. I was on a Skype voice chat with Syer (my new MSR partner) when there was a knock at the door. It was over the weekend when Mom went off to visit with my brother and sister-in-law to see their new house.

At any rate ... after the knock on my room door and I said come in, a person didn't step into the room first, but a Shetland Collie I think it was, and then its owner. She was doing pet therapy around the hospital and asked if I wanted a little visit ... of COURSE I wanted a visit, he was SO cute, cuddly and friendly, and was wearing his own hospital badge. What a sweet little visit that was, and quite the surprise.

I understand that hospital personnel have their jobs to do, but in all sincerity, I don't understand why THEY don't understand that getting rest is just as vital to gaining good health as any of the other stuff ... it just escapes me. Well, I'm home now, and this is going to be a bit of a recovery, but at least I'll be able to sleep when I want and not be continuously interrupted.

I'm feeling a bit tired again (or maybe the pain killer kicked in ), so I'm going to head out for more rest and come back later to share a couple more things.

Oh, and to Alien ... thanks for your cute note Hon. As soon as I've recovered and I don't have to take the pain killers, then we can celebrate for sure ... it's not good to mix pain killers with alcohol.

Thanks for all the support.

 

Sounds like a plan my dear ... it's been a while since we've had a good voice chat on Skype ... I think the previous session lasted what, 3 hours? We were having too much fun for sure, but that's what it's all about, yes? Although Mom is here with me, so not sure we can take up that much time, BUT ... I'm definitely going to make contact with you Hon, so be prepared ... just don't make me laugh TOO much or my super glue will come undone.

 

ON THE ROAD TO RECOVERY, AND ...

Recovery is a bit slow right now given the magnitude of what was done I suppose, but I can tell you that when I had my gallbladder removed in 2000 laporascopically it was a rather quick recovery, and ... I did have staples in the 3 small incisions that were made, which eventually had to be removed. However, I'm guessing (again) that the internal area where the 4th and a bit larger incision that was made with my recent surgery is going to give me a continued challenge for a while given the inside dissolving stitches and what they had to do as a result of what they removed ... cue McEnroe please.



To be honest, I'd rather deal with the temporary pain than what I was experiencing last year that led up to the surgery. And speaking of the surgery ... my surgeon said that she's seriously thinking of presenting my case to the board (not sure exactly what board that is, but her credentials are pretty impressive, including participation in over 45 published journal articles).

Apparently, my case is unique in a few ways, starting with the fact that they couldn't believe I was still walking and breathing (hardly), and driving myself to my doctor's office. It's rather unheard of that I wasn't already coding with a 3.7 hemoglobin level, and they even did the lab test twice because they didn't believe it.

Also, it appears that even though the initial pathology testing that took place during surgery indicated that all was contained and removed, my surgeon said that a few cells had traveled down a bit, but she doesn't think that it made a big difference at all and that I won't need additional treatment. This is another reason she wanted to present my case to the board ... nothing like having your innerds served up on a platter to medical-types for casual conversation.

At any rate ... as much as I'd like to down the whole bottle of pain meds at times, I'm being rather conservative with taking them, because first, I don't like taking medication for anything, with aspirin being the most hardcore thing I take in the greater scheme of things, and second, I don't want to become dependent on the pain meds ... or ... maybe I'm just a masochist and need the pain to remind me to take better care of myself.

Without knowing that I was facing almost certain death with where I was headed in my condition the beginning of last December, and everything I've been through since then, it gives me pause to think about just what a miracle it truly was that I didn't check out, and ... I am not taking that lightly, but rather embracing the fact that somewhere within me, or perhaps somewhere in the universe, the message was ... don't give up, because you have so much more to do.

As it is, I don't ever want to be finished, or reach some final destination, because I am discovering almost on a daily basis just how wonderful it is to achieve a higher level of wholeness, and how much more I can give back in my gratefulness to be able to continue making better choices for myself.

Probably one of the most inspirational songs I can think of at the moment that encourages us to keep on going despite challenges and setbacks, is:

Life Lessons and New Directions is a personal blog I'm working on where I'm journaling both my virtual and real life experiences, and already have 2 parts posted about MS9's journey since giving birth to her on April 2, 2005, as well as my Reflections on 2011. I haven't written anything since before the hospitalizations the beginning of December, but I'm about to get busy and add more.

There are many life lessons to be learned if we leave ourselves open to them (gotta know when to be a teacher and when to be a student), and new directions to explore if you're willing to accept that you don't have all the answers.

While I'm on a familiar path, it's new to me in many respects because of awareness, and I have many to thank for this awakening, including some very special friends in this virtual universe for a nudge or two that now keeps me vigilant in right thinking.

Meaning ... it takes more than a broom to brush away the cobwebs ... and while discovering yourself is an inside job, life lessons and new directions can always be more fulfilling when you have those who genuinely care about your success, and are a reflection in a mirror of truth.

Thank You!

*my apologies for being all grateful and expressing it, but that's what appreciating life does I guess*

 

Thanks Viper ... I'm still taking it all in, but I'm rather distracted at the moment by the level of pain I'm experiencing with this recovery. Moonie keeps telling me that given the 3+ hrs the surgical team was having fun with my insides, as well as what was done, it's no wonder the challenge is what it is, but his remedy of course is to take more meds, which I won't, other than what and how they're prescribed.

He says Mom is here watching out for me right now, so if I take my pain killers closer together and turn into a babbling, drooling idiot, then she can monitor it, but it would also be entertainment for her. He's kidding of course (I think), but when he's chatting on the speaker phone with Mom, I swear those two are conspiring. They're like the best buds ever, and I don't have a chance in hell of getting away with anything.

I hope you're doing well Viper ... shoot me a PM when you have a chance Hon. HUGS!!

Hey my friend ... it's always nice running into you on Skype for sure, even though it's brief at times. Yes, it's been quite a ride, but they say what doesn't kill you will make you stronger, and now I can bear witness to the fact that (for me at least), my strength in conviction and perseverence that life is worth respecting is front and center.

With regard to the revival terminal ... I'm rather glad that it didn't come to that, and that the medical team didn't have to stand clear while they shocked the crap outta my heart. I was under enough stress as it was.

My so-called amazingly positive attitude may be connected to my blood type, which is B+ (be positive)! It's a genetic factor, but ... given that I received 13 units of blood between Dec 7th and Jan 19th with all of them but two being the B+ blood type, that could have been a booster too.

At one of the hospitals, I got two units of the O+ blood type, which is the most common blood type (I believe) that everyone can use, and during those transfusions, I told my Mom and medical staff to be prepared for potential strange behavior. I wanted to have an out and something I could point my finger at if things got a little nuts.

Regarding bruises ... I didn't take pics this time because I was that much of a mess from all the IV's and needlepointing lab techs collecting blood for major panel screenings. The tops of my hands and under side of the forearms, as well as the elbow creases looked like I experienced an EU World Boxing Championship marathon with Blastoise (Meculus), but I know Oleg wouldn't let that happen, and my friend Meculus would be more inclined to hug it out than beat the purple out of me ... he's a sweetheart ... except in the ring ... he's a BEAST.

Recovery is slow, but coming along ... I'm just anxious for it to all be over with so I can get back to normal. In the meantime, I have wonderful friends like you Tim, who help to keep my spirits up, and I am feeling quite blessed as a result of what the outcome of everything was, so I'm not complaining.

I'm also happy that all of this happened in enough time before the launch of Cyrene for me to get some official writing done, as well as prepare for what I need to do after launch. The C-Team is hard at work finishing up on what Ed wants to have available at launch, and it's crunch time now. We're getting close, and I can't wait.

Have a wonderful week! Cheers!!

 

OMG Xandra ... your post absolutely MADE MY DAY, it's AWESOME!!! You have a magnificent way with words that blend together perfectly to get your point across, and ... I love that they're frosted with humor weaved throughout the text ... it's just what the doctor ordered.

And please Hon, don't apologize about your English, because it's great, and I never have an issue with it whatsoever as much as you write. I have to say that I'm always quite impressed with those whose native language isn't English and how well they do. It's often better than some of our home-grown natives who sometimes butcher the English language from a grammatical perspective, but I'll stop there so I don't stir the pot and start a heated discussion about global educational systems ... I could write a dissertation on it.

Thanks for your words of wisdom as well, and yes ... I know that I shouldn't shy away from taking the pain meds, but I just hate drugs that fog the brain while they're trying to reach the area of pain. I'm thinking my aspirin does a better job, but I can't take a lot of aspirin because it thins the blood out ... something I don't need to do right now.
*I'm still cracking up over the TT Gyro FAP 2 (L) comment you made*

You're right though ... trying to be strong and enduring the (pain) madness is rather archaic given the choices we have to assist in the recovery process. I'm just one of those who happen not to like taking drugs of any kind that fog my brain in the process. That's probably why I'm a cheap date, because alcohol is considered to be a psychoactive drug and one of the most (if not THE most) widely used drugs of all time.

I'm actually going to pop a pain pill while I eat my late breakfast since I'm sitting relaxed in my big chair. Mom made strawberry waffles with fresh strawberries on top and they're awesome. I guess you can consider this brunch instead of breakfast given that it's already 11am ... well, it was when I started writing this. Wait a minute ... where's the whipped cream?

The last couple of days have been rather special, and I'm beginning to think my Mom has subtly been collecting her own virtual friends ... from my awesome connections of course. First it was Moonie a long time ago (they're like best buds already), but since she's here with me during my recovery process, she's made a couple more connections.

First it was Syer, my new MSR radio station partner. She doesn't say hello from the sofa while I sit in my big chair talking on Skype, nope ... she comes over and puts the headset on and has a mini-voice chat. She's not shy by any means and is quite witty to boot with a cool sense of humor ... she holds her own.

She and Syer got on famously, but then I happened to be on a voice chat with RAZER yesterday, one of my other most special friends from Holland, and she put the headset on again to make yet another virtual connection, BUT ... while she was putting on the headset, she asked what his name was, and after I said "RAZER" ... she said ... oh, he must be pretty sharp ... YES, she said that.

They had a nice little chat before I got to continue my conversation with him, which I thoroughly enjoyed. I don't get to connect with RAZER that often on Skype, so it was a real treat. We talked about my eventual trip to Denmark to hang out with Lykke and Peter, which I'm hoping will be later in the Summer or early Fall so maybe there will be good weather, and ... depending on when it is, RAZER said that he'll be popping over to visit too.

I was thinking that when I'm able to schedule this trip, I'll create a thread and maybe we could pick a day over a weekend where others who live close enough can make the trek for a visit and we can pull a party together or something. I would SO totally love to do that, however ...

I also learned that MindArk is just over the bridge in Sweden about a 3 hour drive or so, and you KNOW that I'll have to make a trip to the magic kingdom and spread my purpleness around a bit. I have a feeling that if I wasn't an official staff member of Cyrene, that they might not let me through security given how vocal I've been over the years. I'm kidding (MAYbe ), but I also think they know that I've always loved this universe from day one ... and I'm going to leave it at that.

Yesterday I also made my follow-up Dr appointments for Monday and Tuesday next week ... well, at least two of them, and I'm waiting on my surgeon's office to call me back with an appointment as well, but I think I'm going to have to bug them about it. After the appointments with the docs and I get an all clear, then Mom will start making the rounds with the other family members and have visits. At that point, I'll be eyeball deep into my Cyrene writing, because I have to have total silence and no distractions ... that's why I mostly write at night.

At any rate ... let's see how the rest of this week and weekend go, but I have noticed improvement finally, so that's a good sign ... unless it's all being masked by the drugs I'm being practically forced to take.

Ciao for now!

 

THE FOG IS ABOUT TO LIFT ...

It's already been established that I HATE taking meds, but ... even though I have a pretty decent threshold for pain, I've already accepted the fact that I've reached that threshold and I'm not really into torturing myself. However, I also hate any drug that messes with the clarity of my thinking because it messes up the purple stuff, SO ...

I called my doc yesterday and asked if she knew of any pain med that goes after the pain, but doesn't create a fog in the process. Also, something a little bit stronger because what they gave me upon discharge from the hospital wasn't doing the job. Apparently, she's up on the latest, because she called in a script that will go after the pain and not mess with the purple matter!

I have no idea what the name of it is, but when I find out, I'll do a little research and share the info with y'all.

I'm not going to be able to test drive this new drug until I can get my ass to the pharmacy, but that's going to be an issue unless I can get my niece or sister-in-law to stop by to take me because I'm not suppose to drive until next week ... which is going to be an interesting prospect because I now have all 3 Dr follow-up visits scheduled Mon, Tues, and Wed. I'm hoping that this will be the end of it and I'll FINALLY be back to normal ... well, something close to that maybe ... except for the 6 month checkups my GYN/Oncologist specialist wants me to have.

At any rate ... aside from this slow recovery, I was able to catch up with Ed on Skype for a bit of a session yesterday, and it was rather interesting to be updated on how things are going. The C-Team had deadlines to meet, which they did, and now working on the rest that needs to be finalized before the launch.

There's lots of exciting stuff going on, and Lykke posted a couple of threads with exclusive content regarding new mobs at both EP and the Cyrene Forum ... specifically, the Venator here at EP, and the Duster at the Cyrene Forum. Be sure to check them out, because they're quite cool-looking, and I think interacting with them after launch is going to be quite unique. I know that Syer and I will include them in our role-playing activities connected with MSR, so that should be a lot of fun, and ...

I would say that the majority (if not all) of the events and activities will come with rewards of some sort, not to mention that those who choose to participate will be written within the role-playing storyline and included in any videos that Syer will produce, which will then be published. A lot of activities will be broadcast live on MSR as well, but announcements will be made about all that when the time comes.

For now ... I'm working hard on getting myself recovered so that I can go MachStar9 with my hair on fire again, and get involved with all the other "official" Cyrene projects that are in the pipeline for me ... can't WAIT.

In the meantime, I'm working on Vita's character development, and I think the community will find her history and storyline with the Cyrene Skylabs quite interesting, if not more than unique. Ed has quite the creative imagination, and the entire "official" Cyrene storyline is massive and veers off into a gazillion different storylines ... I kid you not.

Ok, off to see what's on the lunch menu ... I think I'll be closing this thread next week after my follow-up Dr appointments, because I have a feeling I'll be back on the road again, and Mom will be heading out to visit with other family members.

Hope everyone has been having a great week.

 

DRUM ROLL PLEASE ...

The name of the pain med that my doctor called in for me is ... Tramadol ... never heard of it, BUT ...

I find it very interesting that no matter what drug you end up taking, the potential side effects can wipe your ass out faster than you can say purple rulez ... not that any of you would say purple rulez ... I'm just assuming you know that already and wouldn't have to say it.

At any rate ... I think my brother is going to pick up my script for me after he gets off of work, and I will try one of these new puppies to see if it does the job, but if it spins my purple matter around like the other stuff, then all bets are off, because I just don't like it. Taking strong drugs that mess with your head mean I can't do diddly squat, so we'll just have to see how this one works out.

I'll be back for an update, but not going to guarantee what kind of shape I'll be in!

 

Ummmm ... I wasn't quite excited about the potential side effects given they're more dire than why you're taking the pain medication to begin with. In no way was I thinking about the actual effects of taking the drug, other than I'm hoping that it doesn't mess with my head ... I hate being foggy.

Also, drugs don't always affect people the same, there are variables that come into play, but ... I have a couple of hours yet before I take my first one of this new pain med. My brother was kind enough to pick it up for me after he got off work, so that was helpful.

I'll be back with my critique ... that's if I'm conscious ... you may have to wait until sometime on Friday!

I just want for the pain to be gone, and my head to be clear ... is that really too much to ask?

Guess we'll see how it plays out.

 

I'm really curious what type of side effects you had Hon, and you can send me a PM if you're more comfortable with that. I can tell you that I took only one pill at midnight my time, which is almost an hour ago, but so far, nothing is going on, either with my head or taking the pain away.

The instructions are to take 1 to 2 pills every 6 hours as needed, but I only took one to see how it goes. I just want the pain to go away, that's it.

I'm rather tired, so I'm going to be heading to bed in a minute since it's going on 1am. I must have a really high tolerance for meds, because they seem to take forever to get through my system. However, I know that if I have a headache from anything, aspirin will take care of it in about 15 minutes ... totally weird.

Catch you in the morning and I'll give an update on this stuff.